I enjoyed keeping a list of all the books I read in 2008 so I thought I'd do it for this year too :) I don't think I'll set myself a target, however, this year - I found myself getting bizzarely worried towards the end of '08 that I wouldn't make the 50 as if it REALLY REALLY mattered. Hee.

For posterity: last year's list.

( Books, books, books )

It is so weird. I come on livejournal every day. I think I just assume I've been updating, when I really really haven't. In almost a month.

So, I carried on with work for a bit, and then about two weeks ago (ish) I finished. Despite the fact that for most of the time I was there I was miserable due to having to work with 'The Clive' (he is seriously a monster) I left feeling fairly upbeat. Probably cos they told me how amazing I was, how much they were going to miss me, and gave me a bottle of wine. It all helps. Probably just an elaborate trap to lure me in for next year though!

Since then I've been getting busy to go - yep, I am finally about to leave for America! This Saturday! Part of my feel hyper over panicked about it, whilst the other half just doesn't really believe that its going to happen. The weirdest things keep freaking me out: like when my mum told me they do the weather ONLY in farenheit! I was all: "But when I watch the weather, I won't understand what they're saying... how will I know what to wear?!". Then my mother told me to get over myself and open a window. Ha. And like, I know clothes sizes are different, but what about shoes... What about bras!? Again my mum was being all practical and saying "just try different sizes on if you can't convert" but I insist that these are legitimate fears about moving abroad.

And that's before I get to worrying about all the big stuff i.e: the fact that I don't have my housing assignment yet (!!!) I really am pretty worried about that one, it has to be said. I may even have to ring the housing people before I go (I'm pretty sure they all hate me already at Clark, because I barrage them with emails). Its so stupid, even though I *know* I'm unlikely to get any communication from them before 2pm minimum (it took me a long time to figure out the time difference, genius) I still refresh my email pretty obsessively.

I'm also not packed yet.

Nor do I remember all the things I need to have for immigration. And I'm not sure where I put my list.

See this is full scale panic... but at the same time I do very little about it because I don't quite believe its happening. I am a perverse type of person.

In fact its even less than a week until I reach the big two-oh. Scary. I intend to spend my last week doing the two things that typified my teenager years: drinking, and revising. Both in the sun assuming that its lasts. :) The weather has been so spectacular.

I have done some reading today (this book called Verbal Hygiene, which is suprisingly interesting) but mostly I have been considering what a serious lack of good (for lack of a better word) "sexy" songs there are. Like seriously, does anyone get turned on by the sounds of Barry White? I mean obviously somebody must, there appears to be a whole industry based around that fact. And I'm not adverse to cheesy music a la Barry White but its not exactly in the mood is it. I even thought of trying to make a mix, but I realised I have very few songs I could think of. I would put Goldfrapp's train on that mix, and definitely something from Metric. Oh and clearly One More Night by Stars. But what else? This really plagues my thoughts, I may have to do some investigating into it.

I also changed my lj layout with some codes from refutare. I really like the colour scheme I came up with. Seems like summer to me.

Sunshine also means spending lots of money on summer outfits. God I love this time of year.

So, Amazon is stopping its DVD rental service, and transferring accounts to lovefilm. I have no idea whether lovefilm is any good, or even what other dvd rental things might be good, so I wondered if anyone could recommend a cheap good one? Just before I throw all my eggs in one basket, just because amazon tells me too!

David Cameron last night pledged to give a third of jobs in his first government to women in a highly controversial plan that risks infuriating male MPs. The Tory leader wants to ensure female politicians are not mere 'window dressing' but can influence decisions affecting women's lives.

Cameron is prepared for a fight, with one aide warning that if men are upset by the plan 'then so be it'. The Tory leader believes women ministers will devise policies that matter to female voters, such as proposals for working mothers to be outlined later this month.

From here

This absolutely infuriates me. Not that I'm against promoting our government being more representative. But promoting women so that they can 'influence decisions affecting women's lives' is beyond insulting. Nobody would say that a male MP is promoted in order to influence decisions affecting men's lives: no, male politicians get to determine policy for the entire population of the country. That the scope of a female politician's aims whilst working for her country should be motherhood and... well I'm struggling to think of other "women's issues" that regularly make it into mainline politics. Maybe that's because I think dividing down the gender line is ridiculous. I can just about see that working mothers comes under 'female' (given the biological neccessity) but surely fathers are interested in the working arrangements of the mother of their child? Women give birth to both male and female children. The whole economy and society feels the knock on effect of individual problems repeated across the country. So surely, actually, this one isn't really just confined to women either?

This whole thing about women only being able to talk to and about women really bothers me at the moment; especially as I am having an ongoing argument with my housemate (another lit undergrad) who refuses to read books by women as "they aren't meant for him; they can have nothing to say to him". And this is a guy who calls himself a male feminist- whatever.

Less than a book a week, that sounds more than manageable! Hopefully not all of them will be university related... This is such a good idea as well- to be honest, I can only remember a handful of books that I read in 2007, but hopefully this will help me to be in a better position next year.

* indicates that is a reread. If I've written a review on Goodreads I will link to it :)

( List. )

51. A Good and Happy Child by Justin Evans

The start of 2008 has been characterised by:

Drunkeness. Dancing. Being surrounded by people I love. People who will dance with me cos they know I love the song. Humour. Love. Music! Craziness! Chocolate fountain. Safety. Anticipation.

Long may it all last. I love  NYE  and I feel optimistic about 2008. I leave my teens this year- I move to AMERICA. I'm excited like woah.


HAPPY NEW YEAR ALL!

mwah! xxxx

I can't believe I haven't posted since I passed my test... that seems like ages ago now. I'm all like a proper driver now, and I just toddle around all on my own with my music up loud but its generally good music so I don't feel so chavvy... except when I'm listening to Radio Broadland... Why doesn't Norfolk have any decent radio? And by decent I mean Magic, Capital and X FM. Those are the only three radio stations I listen to at home, unless I'm forced into some Radio 1. But yes, car! Shopping that doesn't break my back! Being the beloved one who ferries people and/or their stuff around! I'm still enjoying it all at the moment, I'm sure I'll manage to get grouchy and resentful soon though.

So I'm into the last week of term now and my essays aren't done and I feel really shitty. Hm. Oh and my creative writing is just bad. Apparently I forgot that when you write you're meant to be interesting. But now I'm all attached to my little ideas and I don't want to change it so radically that it is a completely different story, so I'm not entirely sure what I'm meant to do with it. I can only say I'm thankful that I did well in the first half of the semester because god knows this half is looking a bit ropey.

On the positive procrastination side though:


Oh in other news: I know where I'm going to in America next year! I got my second choice, which was Clark in Massachusetts (I really need to learn how to spell that :S) I'm pretty pleased. California was always a long shot, only one person got offered a place there, so. And I'm looking forward to travelling up and down the east coast :D And shorter flights! And the college itself looks pretty cool. At first I was mildly anxious because I'm the only person from UEA going anywhere remotely near myself (that sentance doesn't make sense... oh well)... but then I want to have a year where I meet Americans, not where I hang out with people from UEA. So! Excitement.

Now comes the scary visa business.

Also I rewatched season three of doctor who... skipping out the Lazarus business and the dire New York episodes and I was suprised by how much on a second watch I enjoyed it. And how much I'm looking forward to the crimbo special.

Oh AND. I watched the X Factor repeat last night.... and something strange happened to me. I felt sorry for the Same Difference girl and warmed up to them... I HATE Same Difference! How has this happened to me? I still want Rhydian to win though, and I don't care who knows it.

This is a very strange post, hm

I passed my driving test today! Woop, woop!

So what if it took me two and a half years, three attempts and more money than I care to contemplate? I CAN DRIVE. FOREVER!!! My car is being driven up to me by Chris on Wednesday and then I shall zip around norwich like a zippy person..... Aaaah, I'm so excited. I was so sure I was going to fail again, I almost didn't go this morning. And I got 10 bloody minors, not that I care, I'm just happy hehe. In fact I can't believe it, I keep thinking its a dream and I have to look at the bit of paper again.

I want to hang on to this feeling of utter achievement forever. This is something I really had to fight for and it feels so good to have finally succeeded!

Thank you for the kind comments last week, guys. It was pretty damn helpful to get some other perspectives.

Anyway, when it came to the crunch, after the meeting on Wednesday, I decided that I couldn't handle myself if I didn't give America a go. That I was worried about whether it would be a decision I would regret making for the rest of my life. So knowing that it was my decision made me feel a lot stronger about it, not like I am being forced into something I can't stop. So yeah, despite still being terrified at least I now have MADE a decision.

I'm still a bit iffy about the whole study of literature thing (Literature and Desire is the worst unit ever. EVER EVER. I hate it. Seriously today, talking about whether Lear wanted to screw Cordelia, please. PLEASE)... but I guess now I am seeing it as a necessary part, and if at 22 I wanna do something else I will still be young (I will still be young, I will still be young) and I will find the money somewhere. Or I will work for a bit and then I can always requalify later on in life. I don't have to solve my life into neat little packages at 19.


So, all that remains now is to work out where in America I should go. There's a pretty big longlist, but I think I've narrowed my inital interest down to these:

University of California, CA (there's a whole variety of campuses on offer)
Reed College, Portland, OR
Clark University, MA
Rutgers (Camden, New Brunswick), NJ
University of Massachusetts (Amherst), MA
Temple University (Philadelphia), PA
University of Redlands, CA

Though I know very little about America other than what TV has taught me, so if any of you Americans (or anyone else who has any ideas, really!) on my friends list have any views on these universities or where else might be good (in terms of general location, because the list of universities is fixed) then I would really really really appreciate any input. I have to pick 5 and put them in order of preference! That's HARD. I have a few criteria: 1) Relatively easy to get to from UK 2) Not dessert-y, because I wilt in extreme heat (ssh, California would be fine, I'm sure!) 3) Good reputation/ interesting modules 4) Some form of pastoral care, would be nice. So yes, again, input, handholding etc greatfully received!

In other news: its essay season. GRR. Essays always make me fat :(